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  • Writer's pictureDr. Tina Light

Helpless Victims and Elephants!

Updated: Aug 26, 2020




In my quest to help and uplift others (Learning the hard way that I can only do it when I myself am in a good place and uplifted in the first place), I have come across the feeling of being a victim and a helpless one at that, both in myself and others more times than I can recount. And have wondered why?


Why so much resistance towards feeling good and being positive and happy?

Feeling like a victim, is neither a pleasant attitude, nor a helpful one to move towards good feelings or achieving desires. ..


…And I remembered the tail of the elephant tamers: When the baby elephant is born, they tie his foot with a thick rope to a pillar. Being small and weak, as much as the little elephant tries to free himself, he cannot break free from the pillar which is bigger and stronger than him and so he learns that he is stuck and no point in trying to be free…


…Later on, when his mind has accepted the bondage, only a rope tied around the leg, even not attached to a pillar will suffice. He is now a fully grown elephant that can uproot any physical bondage. But not the one created in his mind…

In his mind, he is still that weak little elephant who has no power against the rope and the pillar, and so he remains where he is… a captive!


…And I realized that it is the same story for us humans as well:

As kids we were helpless creatures and totally dependent on and consequently bound to what our parents/guardians/grownups chose for us. And despite the “Knowing”, “Awareness” and “Freedom” we brought with us from the other side, we were made to “accept” and “learn” differently. Of course, in most cases it has been with the best of intentions and based on the reality that was observed with them (grownups) to be the way to survive the reality of this world and so not unjustified and even most of the times necessary, important and extremely vital…

(In here I will not go much deep into the fact that we choose the limitations and our reality as it needs a piece of its own. Just a reminder that before birth, we choose what environment we want to be born in, so that by using the contrast/obstacles we face, we allow ourselves to grow in the areas we find helpful in the bigger picture of our eternal journey.)


And that feeling of being stuck sticks… it will take a conscious move towards awareness and some serious reflection to help us observe the created patterns by default to free ourselves from being a helpless victim and learn to take our Own Life and our Own Reality in our Own Hands and realize that in each and every situation, we Do have a choice. Even if not in action, in the attitude towards whatever we encounter...


Now is the time! The time has come for us to grow up and out of the (self) imposed/chosen bondage(s) and Be in Charge of Our Lives! It is time to claim our freedom…We can choose how to act, react and feel about each and every situation. And whether we chose to allow, accept/adapt, rebel against or be patient and bid our time, the most important part is the realization of Our Freedom to Choose


...On a practical note, Meditation will be extremely helpful to help release these unhelpful habits of mind… Being kind to oneself and others and generally doing acts of kindness is another helpline… And Appreciating the good aspects of life, rather than focusing on the negativity is a wonderful habit to implement! The sacred trinity!

More on them another time…


An interesting take on transcending victim-hood that I came across after writing this piece:




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